Why Can't I Get Over It

I have lived my entire life trying to live up to the expectations of my parents and every time I'm around them I'm reminded of all the ways I let them down. Why am I never good enough for them? Is it a reflection of how they view their parenting skills? Because I am not a failure in life. I am happy when I'm not around them but I cannot shut them out of my life. Sure, I've had stumbles in my life but instead of just helping because they love me, it is repeatedly thrown back in my face.

In my Mom's most recent visit, she started making shit up when talking about me to my friends. To listen to her I was a whore and delinquint when in reality I have never used drugs or broke the law and I graduated high school with honors and a scholarship for college. How does she not remember that?!?

This is me letting it go. It's written and I don't need to think about it until my next visit with them.

Life is taking over!

As much as I fully intend to update my blog on a regular basis, it often falls by the wayside. I may have too many methods of capturing my thoughts. When I started this blog, I intended it to be a replacement for my hand-written journal. However, I can't take my computer with me everywhere I go and I can take a journal. So, in the end, I still use that more.

I've been a little crafty but more gamer lately. Here's a layout I did for Scrapping the Music #166 (take two?). The song is Wide Open Spaces. Head over to their blog to play along to this song until 02-27.

Gwen was the typical 10-year-old-bundle-of-energy last summer and A was her perfect partner. He was always there for her, ready to be as goofy as she, and sometimes more! He's a great uncle and she flourishes in his unerring support.

STM #166 New Shoes

Loved making this layout for Scrapping the Music #165 New Shoes by Paulo Nutini. I got to play with paper in the way I love and I'm entirely delighted with the results.

I knew I wanted to play off of the amazing water in the photo and it was just a matter of figuring out what to do. I tore strips of cardstock and sprayed both sides in my spray box. The great thing about my spray box is that after a couple years of using it, anything wet that goes in picks up a mix of old inks. The result is slight variations of color (I use blues and greens most often so that is usually what is lifted form the box).

I cut a sun out of some Studio Calico paper but wasn't happy with the size... I wanted the sun to be substantial! So cut off the rays and added them to a Pink Paislee journal spot. I'm pretty happy with my sun :o)

Head on over to play along with this round :o)