28 February 2011

Why Can't I Get Over It

I have lived my entire life trying to live up to the expectations of my parents and every time I'm around them I'm reminded of all the ways I let them down. Why am I never good enough for them? Is it a reflection of how they view their parenting skills? Because I am not a failure in life. I am happy when I'm not around them but I cannot shut them out of my life. Sure, I've had stumbles in my life but instead of just helping because they love me, it is repeatedly thrown back in my face.

In my Mom's most recent visit, she started making shit up when talking about me to my friends. To listen to her I was a whore and delinquint when in reality I have never used drugs or broke the law and I graduated high school with honors and a scholarship for college. How does she not remember that?!?

This is me letting it go. It's written and I don't need to think about it until my next visit with them.

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